(A little story, first: I have a friend in Clarksdale, MS who was almost completely deaf. In his struggle to hear, often he would have difficulty with sermons at church. The joke was, often, when he’d lean over to his wife in church and say, “What did he say?” his wife’s answer was always, “Husbands, love your wives.” He joked often with me about finding a new topic for my sermons. So, Gerald, this one’s for you…)
In Ephesians 5, Paul shifts his focus to the marriage relationship between a husband and wife. (This shift of focus is a change of application, not a change of main idea. His main idea, from Ephesians 5:15-6:9, demonstrates how Christians are to walk – filled with the Spirit – in the various relationships of life.) As he examines the ways husbands and wives are to relate (love and respect), he declares that the purpose for Christian marriage is to demonstrate the relationship between Christ and His church (Eph. 5:32). So, the earthly relationship between husband and wife serve to display the eternal relationship between the Bridegroom Jesus Christ and His bride, the church.
With this truth understood, here are my thoughts: First, we ought to absolutely enjoy our marriage relationship. If the two becoming one flesh represents Christ and His church becoming one – whole, complete, satisfied, righteous – then we ought to be joyful about it. Myra and I have stolen a line from the old Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan classic, Sleepless in Seattle. We remind each other from time to time that we are “MFEO: Made for each other.” In light of Christian marriage, and what I believe about God’s Providential activity in my life, I affirm the truth in that. God has given me to her and her to me, so that we can be a part of His process of sanctification in each other’s lives. (In that way, I am God’s gift to woman!)
Second, we ought to celebrate this marriage relationship. If the union of Christ and His church is to be celebrated throughout eternity – and it is – then we ought to celebrate its type here on the earth. We ought not to speak badly about marriage. We certainly ought not to speak ill of our spouse. Can you imagine Jesus running His bride through the mud? (Even though we deserve it…) His whole purpose is to present His bride “in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish” (Eph. 5:27). We should, therefore, as imitators of Christ, act to present our spouse “in splendor.”
Finally, we ought to love the role God has given us in the presentation of His gospel. Crummy marriages are not God’s plan for us. Joyless unions do not extend the kingdom of God. If we really seek to take the gospel seriously, we ought to embrace our marriages.
